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Hello Mr Independent!

We have dived into the deep dark depths of independence recently. There’s been snippets of wanting to do things himself for a little while now. If you leave him to put his shoes on after one attempt they are flying round his head pretending he’s a helicopter. “Stop mummy” is the response i get when reading a bed time story he gets his own book and off he goes, “ah Thomas…(inaudible blabble)…Percy, James and Dorgan… (inaudible blabble). Wipe his own bum? No problem pass me the sudocrem, in fact mummy are you going to the loo any time soon? Let me help you! Making lunch is no problem, why don’t we just eat things from the jars and chew through the packaging? His desperation to do it himself surpasses the fact that he actually can’t open these things yet. Mummy you look like you are struggling with that fork, ive managed mine no problem at all, let me feed you. I can feed Toby Cat all through out the day, even when you aren’t looking, frozen peas and a packet of crisps ok? “Come on, walk?” is monster for ‘let’s go for a walk but you aren’t allowed to bring the pushchair, hold my hand, or even walk beside me’.

His independence has become my nemesis once a week, in the supermarket. This is probably one of my worst I can’t cope moments. “No Mummy! No! Er No!” Monster shouts slapping my hand away from the shopping trolley, yeah ok you push a full trolley around the supermarket darling, queue “right *hands on hips* puuuuuush, heeeeeave” the trolley smashes into shelves/other trolleys/glass cabinets/other stray toddlers.
I don’t understand why at this moment someone elderly likes to comment about how much of a good job he’s doing, when clearly he is giving me a nervous breakdown? “Aww what a good boy! Are you helping mummy?” watch it lady, you’re about to be mowed down! He’ll sit in the trolley seat until we get in the shop, then he waits till I lean over to pick up the bread on the first shelf and he pops up like a surfer just caught a wave, Argh! Shit! He likes loading the trolley too. I’ve become a master at hiding shopping in the isles, more terrified of being caught by the monster than the shop assistants. “Mummy catch” launching tins, jars, eggs – nothing is safe – he doesn’t quite get that you shout catch BEFORE you throw something.

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Independence is a wonderful learning journey. I can only hope to be balancing freedom and a supportive role with sensible boundries for optimising development. (Ooh check me out! Degree used: tick!) But man can these days be stressful! I definitely feel like pouring a glass of wine during “nap time” or crying into a slab of cake. Oh dammit *chants mantra* “I’m the reason why I’m wobbly!” Run your frustrations away and stuff face with cucumber and celery sticks! I know we are only at the beginning it’s only going to get worse. If anyone has a spare supply of patience please send it my way.

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The Pramshed
Keep Calm and Carry On Linking Sunday
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24 thoughts on “Hello Mr Independent!

  1. Oh wow! I am feeling in trepidation building about this phase!! J is only 17 months and already hates it when I hold his hand when walking (unless he chooses to because he wants help or wants to be swung!) The supermarket sounds like chaos! I reverted to Internet shopping at a few weeks old. Although when I do brave it I tend to feed J as we go… survival of the fittest after all 🙂 #stayclassy #triballove

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  2. Haha this really made me laugh, I love the way you write! I have this all ahead of me, the independence and diva attitudes- what a barrel of laughs! Although it’ll all pay dividends when they get older and are able to make a few cups of tea for their long suffering mama! #StayClassy

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  3. That very young new-found independence can be very trying. I used to spend a lot of time waiting for my daughter to zip up her coats so we were always rushing to get places. It’s hard to be patient, but seeing them succeed in “doing it myself!” is such a great reward. If I had extra patience I’d send it your way!!
    #stayclassy

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  4. I remember those days! My daughter who is now a tweenager loves to assert her independence in the kitchen which means egg shell in the cake mix and flour everywhere! However on the whole, being more dependant now is pretty cool so hang in there. #stay classy

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  5. Sorry girl, I don’t have any spare patience! I wish there was a shop we could go to pick some up? That’s too funny that he wants to push the trolley around, although must be very frustrating for you. I too am not a fan of the old ladies, I know they are trying to be sweet but, like I said, I have no patience or time to mess around lol. Thanks so much for sharing with #StayClassy!

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  6. My little one is at this stage. He wants to walk on his own, but then gives up halfway and demands to be carried. He wants to eat on his own-but not using the plastic baby spoon, oh no, using big metal cutlery like Mummy (only Mummy isn’t throwing it around and bashing it on the table). I feel your pain. #KCACOLS

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  7. This did make me chuckle! It must be hard for you though I’m not looking forward to this phase. It’s reinforced my decision to do solely online shopping haha. My husband when he was little was apparently fiercely independent – he’d walk off in shops alone and wouldn’t ever get upset when he realised he couldn’t see his mum, he’d just carry on pottering about! He also once pushed his sister in her buggy (he was about 3 and she was 1) down the road to the bus stop as his mum had got them both ready to go then ran upstairs for a bag!!!! Dear lord I hope I don’t have to deal with that I’d have a nervous breakdown! Good luck. #triballove #KCACOLS

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  8. I am tempted to say ‘ohhhhh nooooo not THAT stage’, but I should say well done to him for being such a trooper and really trying. They learn much quicker if you are able to let them do things for themselves (within reason of course). But it isn’t an easy stage that’s for sure. #FartGlitter

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  9. We are not at this stage yet in our journey, but maybe I’ve seen the odd hint of an independent streak where my daughter no longer wants to sit on my lap (maybe she secretly doesn’t like me). I hope that the supermarket experience wasn’t too awful for you, and that there was a glass of wine at the end of the day. I’m sure that I will be thinking the same thing once we get to this stage. Thanks so much for linking up this week at #fortheloveofBLOG. Claire x

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  10. Haha- we’re here too at the moment. Our compromise is that he ‘pushes’ the trolley from the side….ie: holds on and when we get to the cashier I put him in the trolley and he helps lift stuff onto the belt. He’s actually getting pretty good!

    #fartglitter

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  11. My daughter is a funny mix of being really independent, with lots of shouts of ‘me do it’, while wanting to be near me all the time, my little shadow. She’s started doing the surfer thing in the shopping trolley, but I can normally get her to sit down nicely again with a brioche from the packet that we’re buying! I’m not above bribery over here! x #KCACOLS

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  12. Oh yes I know exactly what your are going through! My youngest is 22 months and she is just the queen of being independent. It is such a hard work. I ended up exhausted sometimes when I have to run after her. Very tiring. She is reaching the terrible 2s at the moment and she has started this horrible tantrums. I’m not really looking forward to the next phase! We all need lots of patient that of course I don’t have! LOL Thanks so much for sharing this at #KCACOLS. Great to have you for the first time. I hope you enjoyed it!. It would be lovely to see you again tomorrow, 🙂 xx

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