I still describe my little monster as a toddler and this feels hugely wrong; he doesn’t toddle! He is fully capable of normal upright non falling over walking right now. He’s a proper pigmy version of a teenage boy, answers me back, willy obsessed, has a ‘girlfriend’, would rather be out on his scooter than inside entertaining me! What’s the next stage?
So far in parenting there have always been stages and phases. The statement ‘its a phase’ is a life safer in the hard times, and you pray that the good times aren’t phases! I’m fully aware there will always be phases right through adulthood too, but stages feel like wishing him to grow up too quickly, cross one off and start on the next. Crawling, tick! Walking, tick! Climbing stairs, tick! Riding a bike…err!
Our stage this week is the ‘I’m my own person; sod you, your rules and my own safety!’ stage, a delightful one you’ll all agree. If he wants to ride his scooter on the arm of the sofa he bloody well will do! If he wants to feed the fish regurgitated carrot from his mouth then he will do that too! Why drink apple juice when you can pour it onto your lap and the chair? Literally pour me a glass of wine right this second and make it be bedtime, I can’t take it!